It doesn't even have a name

I know my mind as the beat drops.
Predisposed to watch rain drops.
On winter days its small pox,
But summer days its moonlight.

I'm so confused, no not confused,
The right words ambivalent.
Torn apart, I'm so concerned by stupid views
That's prevalent.
I'm on the road at 6AM and I'm distracted by the sun rise
So I crash before I make it home, my love life is tongue tied.

Same shit, different day, different shit, same game.
All their needs, they seem confused,
Am I a wall? Cause I'm in their way.
It's this way, path in the woods
Frosted in its eloquence.
I took the path i knew was right
No way this serendipitous.

Take my hand, don't fall behind
This is the climb to mountain top
Put your hand up on my heart
Don't ever let that beat drop.

I'm so obsessed with redemption
Contradictions and that diction
Of words that never fit until you break them and remake them.
Fake it till you make it
Dont eat that cake, but take it.
Thinking I'm a misfit
Till it turns out I'm accepted.

Prestige Campfire

I never did it for attention,
I just did it for myself.
To bring the deep within above to breathe
and bathe within the light.
"I hate to inconvenience you,
But would you edit my thoughts?"
It all seemed so false.
Instead I scribbled pages in notebooks
and sprawled them round the house.
Sometimes the deep within can be sunburned;
It loathes to see the sun.
That's why I burned the notebooks
and watched the ink blacken and float away.
The orange red bonfire glow reflecting the death of unfinished thoughts and phrases on my face
felt like a virgin sacrifice to volcano gods to ensure a good harvest.
The words reflect on the oft conflicted pet within a terrarium
As I was looking in from above.
I'm within the thick glass,
Looking in on myself.
Which self is self?
As if the Prestige.

Paint me Transcendent

Virtue from a crackerjack box;

I miss the self that was at birth,

Enthralled with life love.

Waxing and waning,

I wish to be one with the sun

And have no dark side.

I miss my love

I miss my sparkling devotion.

I yearn to burn the fat from my soul.

Paint me transcendent.